September 2, 2007
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It’s funny, how differently people respond to ideas they don’t agree with.
Some become quite militant and argumentative, some grow tight-lipped and cold, some expansively declare those of differing views to be “idiots” and yet others just walk away. The thing that sometimes astonishes me is just how few people seem capable of saying something like “I respect that this is your point of view, but that’s not how I see it.”
I do find myself wondering about those who are so deeply invested in having everyone around them share their point of view. On some intuitive/psychic level, it almost feels to me like their own identities are coming into question whenever someone else is “allowed” to have a diverse viewpoint.
Many people would tend to stereotypically attribute this kind of behavior to the profoundly religious who try to convert everyone around them… but that would be a gross generalization. Just think about how locked-in people can get, when it comes to anything from politics to family morality.
Those who know me well also know that I can be fairly stubborn. Stubborn, that is, in terms of defending my own points of view. But I care very little whether or not someone else has the same point of view. Sure, I will choose to hang out with those I predominantly agree with (and vice-versa) because I don’t care to waste my time nit-picking and fighting with people.
The other day, someone left a rather derogatory to bordering-on-rude comment on a post here, and several people messaged me, wondering if I was going to “leave it there” or “take him to task.” My answer to which is “What is the sound of ONE person fighting?” I don’t care– he can have his point of view. Often, a person’s own actions can be a much better “rebuttal” than having a brawl with them.
But what the hay… I’ve always been a peacenik.
Comments (9)
I am an atheist who associates with a ton of conservative christian folk. I try not to get into arguments, because they end up with a peer evaluation of my childhood, and usually the conclusion that all of my problems would be solved with a little Jesus. We talk mostly about fashion and boys and school. Definitely not politics.
i admire you for taking no stance.
some people.
*shaking head*
ds
Yours is the admirable choice, sir. I always figure when there’s such a reaction that whatever it was being shared must have hit a nerve. Keep on peacenik-in’ it, sir.
I don’t even defend my point of view…well, unless I feel I’m being misunderstood. But I don’t care who thinks the same as me either. But if I have my choice, I’d whether share time with those that I can relate to…or learn from.
*hugs* ~C
I remember the comment because I took pause for a moment. Then I remembered that your post was about ideas, and that ‘different’ isn’t necessarily bad. That person posted a ‘different’ POV is all. I admire your thick skin … and hope you had a lovely birthday!
I get cold and quiet only if someone is trying to squelch my own thought.
As for theirs, well, who cares? It can only affect me if it threatens me somehow, and most people’s opinons aren’t terribly threatening..
Plus I leave it up to Karma and all that.
Good post, again!
I was having a conversation with my father… one that I told him, “Before we go down this path… I have to warn you, I will tell you things you wont want to hear.” Its like I gave him a choice cause I was particularly happy not talking about the troubling issue at hand. But he wanted to go there and sure enough we argued.
We argued until I finally said,”Look, you believe what YOU want to. I am totally FINE with that… because Im gonna believe what I want to. On top of that, Im gonna do something that makes ME happy. I suggest you do the same.”
Thats how I essentially ended it. I figured no matter what, he wasnt gonna be happy with what I had to say. Thats obvious! So I was straight forward with him and that was that.
Anyhow, when it comes to my xanga… I keep and delete what I want. I do not prefer personal attacks.
I love that – what is the sound of one person fighting lol.
I usually don’t confront people either – and if I disagree with someone’s post, I’ll usually just go away unless it’s someone I know pretty well here. It is funny how people can take it so personally. I think sometimes people are defensive because they’re afraid they really are wrong! No one wants to have their ideas trashed!
Why do people feel the need to leave such comments. I always enjoy reading what you have to say, even though I rarely comment.