November 13, 2008

  • Time and…. stuff

    It’s funny how time just runs away from us, sometimes.

    Perhaps John Lennon expressed it best: “Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans.” That famous quote doesn’t even include the word “time,” yet it encapsulates how things just “keep going,” no matter what we’re doing. And we can either be “bystanders,” or “participants.”

    I haven’t exactly given up on the idea of blogging. After all, I’ve been a member of the blogosphere since before there even was a blogosphere. I came to xanga five years ago (this month) because I got a very clear “message” from the Universe that I needed to be here, rather than “waste my time” on blogger, where there really was no sense of community and it was just the “wrong” place. Going into detail about what that cryptic sentence “means” would require a book, not a blog post, so I’ll leave it at that.

    The point being, that this blog has served its original purpose, and I’m sortof pondering what to do with it. What direction– if any– to take it. Don’t get me wrong, I still love writing. And I like to ponder the imponderables of the Universe, in writing. But where doing so was once something I pursued with almost religious fervor, now…. not so much.

    And I guess that’s partially what I mean when I feel like time has “run away.” And “other things” are more important, these days.

    It amuses (and saddens) me– about our society, in general– how we all live in the ostensible “Pursuit of Happiness,” while often keeping ourselves in a state of helplessness. People strive to be whole, better, functional, successful, content, at peace, and whatever. Yet the vast majority of communication and “societal chatter” is about what’s wrong, and who sucks, and UNhappiness, and strife, and anger, and arguments. On one hand, we aspire to be (and be like) Happy People, but the moment someone admits that their life actually is frakking brilliant and, yes, they are HAPPY, we start tearing them down and saying things like “You’re just delusional, living in a fantasy world, life IS NOT LIKE THAT!

    The popular saying is “misery loves company.” Where’s the parallel quote about happiness?

    One of the things that always strikes me about happiness… and perhaps also hints at why people more readily “tear down,” than “build up,” is that happiness requires a sort of personal accountability. Happiness is something you have to dream up, define, create and then “own.” It’s internal. YOU create it. It comes from YOU. Nobody “gives it” to you. And– in some ways– that makes happiness “scarier” than unhappiness because it demands that we be willing to expose ourselves to the buffeting winds of naysayers and the vast majority who don’t want to be ultimately accountable for the outcomes of their lives.

    UN-happiness… well, it thrives on external blame, fear, mistrust and merely pointing out what is “wrong” with other people, ideas, actions, laws, beliefs, societies. “Everyone else” gets to own your problems. You choose to blame “ridiculous qualification requirements” for getting passed over for that job, rather than accept that you partied your way through college and never completed your degree, as a result of which you simply need to be “more” than the degreed folks, to get what you want. You attribute your sad relationship history and your disillusionment with love to such “facts” as “all men (or women) are pigs,” rather than accept that you’re always stressed to the gills and have anger management issues… and so it IS “about YOU” and not “about THEM.”

    I sensed a subtle shift in the background energy of the world, late in the evening of Tuesday, November 4th, 2008. Generalizations are, of course, dangerous– which is why I chose the word “subtle.”

    When we set aside all the “historic factors” of the election, and all the obviously visible paradigm shifts, beneath it was this subtle shift towards “hope and idealism,” and away from “mistrust and control.” I’m not sure it had anything to do with government, and who is going to be the President of the United States. I believe it had to do with choosing the possibility of happiness– as a global community, rather than resigning ourselves to the status quo of “everything is always going to be fucked up.”

    Perhaps my perspective is skewed by the large number of commentaries, articles and blogs I have heard/read over this past week– written by African Americans (and other minorities, as well)– around the essence that “one of OURS is President of the most powerful nation on earth, and it just became a LOT harder to assign external blame to our discontent– WE must be the example, and be more accountable for our lives and happiness, now.”


    Whereas this sentiment may run strongest within the African-American community… isn’t the underlying message really to all of us? We create our realities– nobody comes and serves it up to us, on a silver platter… or if they DO, don’t we have the choice to say “No, I don’t think that’s mine. I’d rather have something else?

    I believe we do.

Comments (11)

  • Well said… as always.
    I think I own my happiness AND my sadness. In fact, I am a little too quick to blame myself for things that really aren’t all about ME. My last two posts have been about me trying to figure myself out in terms of a relationship. I haven’t done that for a while and it feels good.

  • I stumbled on your post and glad that I did.  Well done.

  • Personally, I get very happy for people that ARE happy.   It made me feel wonderful when my sister finally got herself ‘together’ and is enjoying her life.  I don’t wish unhappiness on anyone. 

    As for the ‘subtle’ energy you speak of on Nov 4th…. well, it was anything BUT subtle for me.  GEEZ, that energy kicked my arse.  I was in so much pain, couldn’t breathe and by body was blown up.  I felt like I was birthing the election through my body.  That’s why I went away….. I needed to get back to nature and BREATHE.  It was over a week prior to the election that I started having problems, peaking on the election night, with 80% subsiding directly afterwards.  The other 20% by Friday when I was driving away. :)

    I think the word Unity is what I hear the most, and it’s coming from many communities. 

    *hugs* ~Colleen

  • Amen, we do! Good to see your fonts, Peter.

  • Definitely, we all have that choice.  I’m living my choices now, and enjoying it. 

    I think as our lives even out from the as high highs and as low lows, when we find a more emotionally content state blooming in our lives, there is less to blog about.  Perhaps that’s part of the reason for your not being so present here much lately.  I know it’s certainly part of the reason why my blogs, though still frequent enough, are not so interesting to folks as back when I was less settled within myself.  I really do feel people just want others with whom they can commisserate (sp) – in like spirit.  Which is fine, of course, just when you change, things around you change as well, to some degree anyway.  (And thank heavens they do!)  And the parts that don’t change, well your changing is enough to alter most that stays the same – perceptions shift.  Isn’t it grand?   (by my saying “your” I am being general, not saying “you” per se)  Now, I think I may go blog on this topic some… maybe

  • amen! ^_^ yay, I commented again after so long…^^;;;

  • AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH that was a GREAT post. i’m here nodding my head the whole way thru.

    yes, the obama thing, i felt that too, big time…i guess most feel inside that change is possible, that things in the world “aren’t right” and know deep down what IS right…and having so many stand up and and vote for hope of change (ANY change)…then to look around and see how many others did so….like we’re all on a team, and OUR TEAM WON!! and our team was so much bigger than we thought…

    and I’M CANADIAN. but it was in other countries also. the uplifting.

    ok and yes you have to create happiness not just sit and be crappy that you aren’t GIVEN it , or even that you aRE given it, but you have to choose to SEE it, in the little things. you have to be accountable that you are creating your own crappy , or happy, life.

    cheers, gotta go, kid is home

  • I have to point out that 52 percent isn’t exactly a hearty endorsemnet. 

    America is an amazing idea, and that we have a system of peacefully transferring power every few years speaks well of its desgn. Everyone will be watching to see what this message of “hope and idealism,”  will look like in practice.

  • Wow!  This is such an excellent post, Peter!  Thank you so much for sharing it!!

    Thank you also so much for your very kind words!!   I sure do appreciate it!  (((Hugs)))

  • Have a very Merry Christmas, Judi

  • You may enjoy this little thing. I know, you’re interested in words.

    I have come to not only own my own happiness, but to enjoy and use it. Some people don’t want to enjoy things…they don’t want to enjoy their happiness because of the fear that people will make them feel ashamed for being so damn happy. I’ve come across people here lately that want to shame me into something because i’m happy. And for the first time in a long time, I’m *happy* with where I am, with the one exception of money, and isn’t everyone always working under the crunch of money. So folks pile on guilts because you know, I shouldn’t be so darn happy. My mother hears me say “oh, mom i’m happier than I have been in a long while” and she calls to tell me my sisters issues, her issues, my aunts issues. “I’m happy” I tell my freinds, and they go on about money or how I should be careful because “he may be using you” and all this. It amazes me, how if you state boldly “I’m happy” the choir sings woe to you.

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